I decided the other night to watch some TV, and as I was flipping around I landed on the Disney channel. If you know anything about the Disney channel you’ll know they’ve been promoting a movie for months now. The movie is called Camp Rock and guess what it’s about? A MUSIC CAMP. (no rock involved, sadly, unless you count the Jonas Brothers as rock. I don’t.)

So out of curiosity and possibly a bit of laughter (probably not at the “funny” parts of the movie) I started to watch the movie. I caught it about halfway through, but what I managed to gather was this:

Mitchy (what a name), played by Demi Lovato, is attending Camp Rock. She has told everyone, including the little popular clique, that her mother cooks for celebrities and her father is rich. What they don’t know is that her mother is actually the CAMP’s cook (ooh drama) and her father isn’t really anyone special. Tess, the leader of the popular clique, sees Mitchy saying goodbye to her mother and thinks “Z0MG SHE LIED L0L LET ME GO TELL MY FRIENDS!” which she then does. Mitchy looks like an idiot in front of the whole camp. Meanwhile, she has been singing to some guy named Shane, played by one of the Jonas Brothers (I don’t know his name but I think he’s the oldest one). Tess gets jealous of Mitchy and plants a charm bracelet in the kitchen, announcing that it has been stolen. Mitchy and a friend take advantage of a loophole and play in the camp’s final event, aptly named Final Jam. Sprinkle in some singing by the Jonas Brothers, Britney Spears type pop, and about one song that didn’t bother me. That’s basically Camp Rock in a nutshell.

NOW COMES THE INCONSISTENCIES.

Inconsistency Number 1: Shane is singing to Mitchy when they are alone. WHY ARE THERE BACKUP SINGERS INVOLVED?

Inconsistency Number 2: In the Final Jam (end of the movie basically) there is a girl singing a song and playing a guitar. The fingering and strumming look off. L0l fake guitar?

Inconsistency Number 3: In a hip hop dance part, where they are supposed to be just following Shane, the whole camp performs the dance perfectly (except for the coolest guy in the movie, a drummer, who falls down at the end to possibly make it look more natural and set up a pun of “dancing to the beat of a different drum”.) when it’s supposed to be their first time.

Inconsistency Number 4: At Final Jam, Mitchy and Shane sing side by side with microphones. I was expecting microphone feedback@@

The Biggest Inconsistency: You can tell everything has been studio mixed when it’s supposed to be “live”.

If any of those were explained in the half of the movie I missed, I will admit defeat. But for now, I HAVE PICKED APART CAMP ROCK. DISNEY, DO A BETTER JOB NEXT TIME.

In other news, the new RuneScape graphics are beautiful. <3